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A's Lay Another Egg On National TV, 9-4

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"Woah, that's actually going kind of far!"
"Woah, that's actually going kind of far!"
Kyle Terada-USA TODAY Sports

To Whom It May Concern,

I am authorized to represent the A's fan "Nico" in this matter. It was represented to my client that the period of time "on or about 5:00pm" to "on or about 8:00pm" would be full of excitement, drama, and compelling baseball. My client believes this has been misrepresented and demand is hereby made for three hours of his life back.

I believe there is precedent in the 1992 case of Snerdberg vs. The Baltimore Orioles, reaffirmed by the 9th circuit court of appeals in the 2009 case of Gagglehoff vs. The Cow Palace, in which The Cow Palace was ordered to return nearly four hours of his life back to Mr. Gagglehoff.

Thank you in advance for your anticipated cooperation in this matter. Sincerely,

Louis Dewey, Esq.
Law Firm of Dewey, Cheatham & Howe

If the rest of America perceives the A's as being less than fantastic, perhaps it's that the A's have saved two of their worst efforts for their first two appearances in ESPN's Sunday night game since something like the 16th century. Tonight was just epically awful, with the Angels pulverizing Scott Kazmir and then greeting Jesse Chavez with more of the same.

Kazmir was torched for 10 hits and 7 ER in 3+ IP and pitched every bit as badly as his line. How did the Angels score in jumping out to a 8-0 lead by the 4th inning, 9-0 by the 6th? I believe the correct answer would be "easily". They scored by Josh Hamilton crushing a belt high fastball into the RF bleachers for a 2-run HR. They scored by Erick Aybar slamming a 2-run double high off the wall in straightaway CF. They scored by letting Kazmir get 2 strikes on Kole Calhoun and then serve up a hit. Yeah, that happened 3 times, twice on 0-2 pitches and once on a 1-2 pitch.

The precise order and sequence of these hits and runs is somewhat of a blur, as I began drinking heavily in the top of the 2nd and quickly got to the bottom of a fifth. Which is more than one can say for Kazmir. At one point I was either seeing double from the alcohol, or else two Mike Trouts hit a titanic shot into the camera well beyond CF off of Jesse Chavez.

Didn't expect Kazmir to get lit up and for tonight's showdown to result in a blowout? Then you probably also didn't anticipate HRs in the same inning by Alberto Callaspo (2-run HR) and Andy Parrino (solo HR). It was the 7th and unfortunately the inning began with the Angels leading 9-0, but it was still fun. Oakland mildly teAsed in the 9th, plating a run to make the final score look a tad more respectable.

What's not fun, besides the A's dropping back into second place by a full game, is that the only A's who aren't injured are the ones who are hurt. Sean Doolittle has gone on the 15-day DL with a strained intercostal muscle. I'm not too familiar with the intercostal but I'm pretty sure it's a kind of religion. John Jaso is a DL candidate with concussion-like symptoms, part of why the A's acquired Geovany Soto earlier today. Josh Donaldson sat out with continued knee pain but an MRI apparently showed no structural damage.

Oh, and the A's are now just 5 games ahead of the Seattle Mariners. And yes, I am available for parties.