There's a high flyin' bird
flying way up in the sky
OAK 1st: Weeks grounded to SS. Coco walk, steal 2nd; tied for 1st in AL. Matsui rope to RCF, Coco to 3rd. 1-1 pitch, Willingham's 6th 3-run HR (#29, 98 RBI) off facing of 2nd deck, just missed full integration with "42" Jackie Robinson sign. 3-0 A's. DeJesus singles to LCF, Carp -- not normally an OFer -- shoulda caught it. WP, DeJesus to 2nd. Sizemore grounds to third, DeJesus holds at 2nd. Suzuki lines to CF, 3-0 A's.
SEA 1st: Ichiro serves a single to left with a patented Chris Evert 2-handed backhand. Luis Rodriguez singles, 1st & 2nd. Ackley Ks on a sinker on the hands. Carp DPs Weeks-Sogard-Allen. 3-0 A's.
OAK 2nd: 2 outs, Weeks 26th 2B challenging Ichiro, but Rodriguez drops it, safe. Coco grounds out, 3-0 A's.
OAK 3rd: 1 out, Josh Willingham walks (Beavan would sooner pitch to Josh Gibson judging by his body language), DeJesus singles, 1st & 2nd. Sizemore singles right on the RF line, Hammer scores, DDJ to 3rd. 4-0 A's. Suzuki sac fly, 2 feet shy of a 3-run HR to tie his career best of 15. 5-0 A's, Beavan fooling no one in particular.
SEA 4th: Cahill retires 9th-10th-11th in a row after shaky 1st.
OAK 5th: Matsui singles with 2 strikes. Willingham Ks. DDJ Ks. Sizemoar HRs off hanging breaking ball into the A's bullpen. Blake Beavan contemplates new career as Pony League BP pitcher in Tacoma, WA. Maybe he should switch with the M's ballgirl they keep showing, she's got game -- likely a better fielder than Chris Carter at several positions. Man, that sounds SO dirty. 7-0 A's.
SEA 5th: Cahill, where have you bizzle with this shizzle all yizzle? 13 in a row, WTF? "Pete" Seager busts the monotony with a double into the RF corner. DDJ calls for a walker or some crutches out there, oops. "Gordon" Liddi proves he hates commies like Seager, refuses to drive him in as Seager pleadingly croons "Where Have All the Flowers Gone?" standing at 2nd with banjo he got from Michael "I am hitting .150" Saunders. Liddi grounder to SS, Sogard pulls BA off bag but Brandon tags Liddi like the Washington, DC Police. 3 outs.
OAK 6th: Radio replaying Allen's moonshot in Yankee Stadium, seems like those ancient Mayan history shows on cable where great civilizations just disappear. Jamey "This Can't Be" Wright in for Beavan, who may have renounced worldly attachments and joined a monastery after tonight's paddling: 7 ER, 8 H, 2 HRs allowed. Ballgirl could have held us to less. Allen singles, hearing those KayaHOOay footsteps and it's not even March. Keebler flies out but is still an adorable cookie puss. Weeks grounds out, BA to 2nd. Coco robbed of RBI by a diving Liddi, who thought he was reaching for Daniel Ellsberg's psych records I guess. Still 7-0 A's.
SEA 6th: Yawn, 3 up and down. 3-hitter so far for the Ptrevordactyl, he is dealing like Vargas was last night.
OAK 7th: Replay of Gojira walkoff vs. Texas. VC sounds as excited as he might have if the actual Godzilla had appeared from the Oakland Hills and destroyed the Coliseum. Good times.
SEA 7th: Cahill walks Ackley, first of game for him. 92 pitches for Trevor. Carp stinks like year-old fish, pops out. Smoak smoaks a hit to RF, 1st & 2nd. Olivo Ks on a pitch out near Puget Sound somewhere. Seager lines to Allen, sorry M's, maybe next millennium. Still 7-nil.
OAK 8th: Sizemore walks. 'Zuk pops out, breaking Dave Kingman's career record of 27,089,311,443. Allen pops out, vowing to entire dugout he will break the record Suzuki just set, should he somehow learn how not to strike out 17 times a game. Elf singles, stadium receives free Chocolate Lovers cookies. Weeks flies out, just for unanimity's sake. Almost done and good cuz I am getting hungry.
SEA 8th: Cahill out, Breslow in. KenKo says Melvin has met with players to tell them "2012 expectations are high." If we don't sign Hammer and end up playing all kids, Bob may want to GET high by May. 1-2-3 inning for Brez.
SEA 9th: Blevins (EN's newest friend on Facebook) in. Popout, K, popout... that makes 27! Blevins avoids immediate unfriending. 7-0 and a sweet shutout -- the 11th in 2011 for the A's -- for my last game.
All right, dinnertime! There's a salmon sammitch, as yet unassembled, with my name on it so I will see you guys on the flip side! Thanks for everything and a really fun 2+ years, I really appreciate it and I wish all of you nothing but all the best, always =D
3 game series vs Mariners @ SAFECO Field
WP: Jason Vargas (10 - 13)
SV: Brandon League
LP: Brandon McCarthy (9 - 9)
|2 - 4 loss|
WP: Trevor Cahill (12 - 14)
LP: Blake Beavan (5 - 6)
|7 - 0 win|