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A's Score a Touchdown, but Yankees Score Two Touchdowns and a Field Goal

It was a hot, hot night in the Bronx, and the A's had absolutely everything working against them in tonight's game. Despite scoring seven runs of their own, the A's and Trevor Cahill were simply decimated by the Yankees' offense. It would be the same old story of the A's at Yankee Stadium, except this time, the Yankees dropped seventeen runs on the green and gold. Sadly, that is not a typo. Hell, if you can't be good, be good at it; that is losing in spectacular fashion.

Here's what we learned tonight:

Trevor Cahill sucks in New York.
Michael Wuertz is hurt. And at this point, I hope he is because no one should ever pitch like that healthy.
Devine, Joey: See Wuertz, Michael.

You want to know how bad it was? Let's just say that I can still blame the A's offense for being crappy; even though they scored seven runs. Cahill had the shortest outing of his career, at two innings. He gave up nine hits and ten earned runs in what felt like six hours of pitching. The first third of the game seemed as if it would never end.

It all started so normally. The A's got one run in the first on a Sizemore double. They would lead 2-0 in the second after a Pennington single. That would be the last time they would a) lead b) not be embarrassed on East Coast television.

Here is what happened in the Yankees' second: RBI single, RBI single, 2-RBI single, sac fly. Five runs. 5-2 Yankees.

Here is what happened in the Yankees' third: After giving up a 3-run homer to Swisher and back-to-back singles, Cahill was yanked in favor of Wuertz. Wuertz gave up a single to load the bases, walked in two runs, and for his final trick, gave up a grand slam to Teixeira to put the Yankees up 14-2.

You would think this would be an easy win for Phil Hughes. A's offense? A twelve run lead? It's in the bag, right? Wrong. Hughes wouldn't complete the fifth. Pennington hit a two-run homerun in the fourth to give the A's a total of four runs, and Coco singled in Weeks, after Weeks (who was 3-6 on the night) doubled for the fifth run. Weeks would single in two more runs in the fifth, giving the A's 7 runs on the night, and chasing Hughes from the game. The A's had the chance to load the bases with one out and really make a dent in the score, but Coco was called out on what was a ridiculously awful strike three. Not even close.

The Yankees would score some more, as the A's used every pitcher in the 'pen except Balfour and Bailey. One notable moment was in the seventh, when Devine did a perfect reenactment of the "Wild Thing" in Major League. Remember "Ball Four", "Ball Eight", "How do guys lay off pitches that close?". That was Devine for his three batters.  I think he threw a ball to everyone behind the plate except Suzuki. When all was said and done, the final score was 17-7. We really don't need to say much more than that. Oh, and don't watch SportsCenter.

Hope your Friday is better than theirs.