Low, No Heroes, Not Lodger: Shin-High Strikezone, Lack of Early-Count Aggression Help Halos Stuff Listless A's, 4-2

Some nights, even the chameleonic British rock stars have a more realistic idea of the strike zone than the umpire does.

Absolutely gorgeous portrait of the number of right-down-Broadway, hittable first-pitch strikes the Athletics got the bats off their shoulders to swing at tonight.

OK, so there's not a whole helluva lot to say about this one... it was a pretty straightforward mess from the start.  Three hitters in, the A's and Ben Sheets were down 2-0, on the strength of a Bobby Abreu 2-run blast on a fastball that looked as flat as a 4th Grade Girls' Gym Class (I know, tasteful, huh? I do it all for you, AN!).  After that Ben settled down some, going 6 and giving up 4 runs (3 were earned), but his heater was velocity-challenged and that is never good.  He had a really nice curve and just about the best change-up I have seen him have since he came to Oakland, but it didn't matter much, given that the Athletics didn't even get on the board until he was gone from the game... and that was on a Jake Fox HR off Sandy Koufax, um, I mean Scott Kazmir (same initials... so maybe we can hope Jered Weaver looks like John Wooden [RIP The Wizard of Westwood] tomorrow, right?) inside fastball.  Not that I need to say that it was off a fastball, given that Jake Fox has never hit a major-league breaking pitch in his 27 (28 on July 20th, a coincidence considering he belongs in an AL uniform like I belong in an astronaut's space suit) years on Earth.

Just in time for their latest visit to the Five Ten, the Angels -- winners of 8 of 9 and 6 in a row -- are catching fire.

This game wasn't really as close as the final score indicated... once again the A's (somewhat like Tim Lincecum's attitude when he calls in for his weekly Pot Stash Delivery) waited for the Eighth, when they at last decided to mount something resembling a rally.  That died, along with any realistic chance we had of stealing this game, when Jack Cust (who was 0-4 and looked utterly feeble tonight, and not just vs. the lefty Kazmir) struck out [[[gives you a moment to pull your jaw up off the floor on that one]]] as the potential tying run.

The Athletics' approach at the plate tonight, regardless of the moronic umpire's ankle-level strike zone, looked about as aggressive and confident as [[[falls asleep mid-caption]]]

In even more fabulous news, Rajai Davis was removed from this game after legging out a stand-up triple, with what is being reported as tightness in his left hamstring but is probably going to require the amputation of both legs, if the A's usual Truth Quotient when it comes to reporting on injuries is any indication.  Eric Patterson replaced him and finihed the game batting leadoff, causing those of us watching on TV here to wonder if we should just go for it and sign New York Governor David Paterson to bat first for us.

As if that wasn't bad enough, we have Weaver, uh, looming tomorrow.

So it's HFARTMZ (Hope For A Return To Mazzaro-World) tomorrow as Vin takes the ball in place of Brett "Bored, Stuck In Traffic and Doing Laundry" Anderson vs. Jered Weaver... hopefully at some point the A's can begin to get more love from the DH spot than the Leona Helmsley levels they have gotten so far this season... either that or they are gonna have to start looking at Carter.  Not Chris... I mean Lynda. 

Not pictured: A's slugging OF prospect Elizabeth Taylor.

Join Dan Dan the Merqury man tomorrow for all the fun, starting at 7 PM as per usual... despite tonight's sleepwalk we are only a half game further from first place then we were coming into this one, thanks to Cliff "Babbacombe" Lee and his complete game win over the Torqueless Strangers earlier today.  So there's hope, at least a sliver of hope and maybe by tomorrow night we will be singing a different, more pleasant, tune o_0