Open Thread - Game 75: Pittsburgh Steelers @ San Jose Earthquakes

17 consecutive losing seasons? Arrrrrrrrrrrr.

Poor Bobby Crosby. Sad Pirate, no Booty. Arrrrrrrrrrr.

BBG's at Dodger Stadium, so I was gonna write an elaborate Friday Game Thread with pictures and alcohol and really try to make the effort to do it at the very high level that a professional outfit at the cutting edge of its industry demands. But there have been all these injuries, and since half the front pagers went down with carpal tunnel we just haven't had the creative kind of season we were looking for from our top people. Plus, there have been the slumps from our top commenters we just could not have foreseen, like when Mike V. was lost for six weeks in the Large Knife and Bushmills Incident, or Lynnzgal's unfortunate run-in with those stray bacon-wrapped scallops that cost her the whole month of Remulac.

Our BlogFather's better half prepares for 1970s Night at their compound in the Himalayas outside Nepal.

I want to stress that none of this is Nico's fault... he put together the team he thought could win a very vulnerable division and for the 4th straight year it just hasn't worked out. Plus, all the blown calls that have went against us, like the Infield Goat Rule thing and all the other day. Thankfully, I'll still have this job to feed my family of 72... all due to my good fortune at having been his Best Man when he married that Tibetan Yak a few years back... whew! Thank the Lord I won't be held to a standard of observable excellence at this, like anyone else doing any other job on the face of the Earth! What can I say? We blog with what we have, and no one is to blame.

Thankfully, we're playing a team that makes us look like the 1961 NY Yankees exponentially raised to the power of the 1989 Oakland Athletics. Arrrrrrrrrrrr.

Tonight our San Jose Canseco A's welcome in the Pittsburgh Pirates, who occupy last place in the NL wherever-it-is... Brad "Did you enjoy the play, Mr." Lincoln, who isn't really very good, will take the ball vs. Ben "Spread" Sheets, who used to be sort of good before his elbow fell into that Cuisinart. So look for Brad to suddenly turn into Don Drysdale, as the Athletics always make it a point to be hospitable hosts, regardless of the chunks of loose concrete falling on their patrons at the Mausoleum Coliseum.

Actually, I am reasonably optimistic about this weekend... not the games, but my chances of scoring at Gay Pride, pictorially represented above.

OK, it's another Interleague orgasm -- don't laugh, in grandma's day that used to be frowned upon and even illegal in some Southern states -- coming your way on a Friday Night Follies tip. I'm here, queer, and I fear I need a beer, but here I will stay to post thread after thread for you guys to express your unhappiness with the concept of vuvuzelas in, so have at it and LET'S GO OAK-LAND!!! Woo-hoooooooooo!!!!

A crime like this requires line-ups, if only to identify the suspects:

[[[Oops, sorry, the Sports Data Widget that controls the lineups is late back from playing golf with Bob Geren. Arrrrrrrrr.]]]

Ah, there, that's better. Did you shoot a good round, Bob?

OK, have fun y'all... I'll try not to fall asleep or abdicate to the dollar store in the middle of it, regardless of my well-documented fetish for cheap 3-liter bottles of Shasta Cola.