Yesterday's forecast for Saturday in The Bronx was ominous. ("107% chance of rain ... In just a moment we'll start boarding for pairs of animals with names A-G... Right now we're pre-boarding any small puppies or kittens, any animals with 3 legs, turtles over the age of 100, and those who just need a little more time boarding -- please come to the front of the ark...")
But now they're thinking they might give it a whirl after all, as "100% chance of rain from 2:00pm-9:00pm" has turned to "well, except when it stops -- yes, weather forecasting has proven to be as reliable as predicting how J.J. Hardy will hit, where AN will rank Grant Desme, or what it really looked like when you saw, on Gameday, "In play, run(s). Matsui hits a fly ball single to 3B, Damon scores."
Now while we wait for the game to (hopefully) start, here's a free bit of advice: If you're shopping around for illnesses, may I not recommend strep throat. You may have noticed, in my comments this week, how hoarse my voice has been. All I can say, having missed an entire week of work for the first time since I can't even remember, is "Thank God for baseball!"
You know it's not good when you go to your doctor, he shines the light to the back of your throat and exclaims, "Oh my." At least when I told him it was excruciatingly painful to swallow, he did not reply, "That's what she said!" That's right: mikev is not my Primary Care Physician. My considered advice is that if you're looking to try out a new illness, you can do better than strep throat. If you look good in yellow, why not try jaundice? Or scurvy, if you're not too fond of fruits anyway.
But the point of telling you all this is not for you to feel sorry for me, it's to...it's so that...it's...No, I got nothing. I seriously hope the Yankees lose today and I'm also hoping the Angels lose. A.J. Burnett against Joe Saunders, if you really must know.
Riddle: What did Chone Figgins say to Erick Aybar on New Year's Eve?
"Hey, Erick. Want to go to New York and watch the ball drop?"
