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Another Offensive Performance

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It sounds like Shields pitched well, but really it's unlikely the A's could manage more than a couple hits and a run off of Yarnell right now. Not much to say about the latest dullapalooza, but here's a few thoughts about the A's offense:

* Jason Kendall has not yet hit rock bottom as a hitter. That'll be when Ichiro throws him out at first base, which he will. Those 8-3 putouts are a bear.

* Dan Johnson should try triple vision, because while double vision didn't serve him well, single vision doesn't seem to be a whole lot better. So much for his foray--oh, did I say "AAAA"?--into the 2007 campaign so far.

* Travis Buck and Danny Putnam look like minor league hitters. Jerks.

* Request to Chavy: Let's start a conversation on "hitting the first pitch" and we'll just talk about the first thing that pops up.

* Request to Shannon Stewart: If you're going to throw like a girl and have a girl's name, could you at least hit as well as one?

I got a million of `em, folks. You know things are going bad offensively, when:

* It feels like you're finally rallying, and you realize it's just a 2-1 count.

* Your best rally comes when the catcher accidentally throws ball 4 into center field.

* You're tempted to bring the infield in and it's only the second inning.

* Those last two things actually happened tonight.

Hang in there, A's--you may score less often than a girl at the Neverland Valley Ranch, but you're only one game out of first place!