<caller> Long time listener; first time caller. My name is baseballgirl.
<A's radio show host> Hello, baseballgirl!
<caller> Well...I knew I had a problem in high school, ya' know? It was the nineties and the A's couldn't win...well...<breaks down sobbing>...they couldn't even win in a benches-clearing brawl! <covers face>
<A's radio show host> There. There. The A's have come a long way since then. For instance, look at the team today! Great pitching, a couple of legitimate superstars, another one on the way. Things look great! <surreptitiously pulls out `Aflac' corporate nametag>
<caller> Well, I suppose you're right. Isn't baseball fun? <masks gagging noise> So...anyway...what do you think the A's chances are in today's game?
<A's radio show host> Awesome!Danny!Haren!, who hardly ever gives up homeruns, and certainly is not prone to the big inning, is facing off against some guy named R. Johnson. Don't really know much about him, but I'm sure the A's stellar offense will knock him around.
<caller> What do you think about today's lineups?
<A's radio show host> Well for the small team from some little city...um...Bronx something, we have this crew:
And for the Mighty Green and Gold, we have these unstoppable players:
My attempt at a positive spin <takes a bow>