Say it with me: eh-STAY-bann Loaiza makes his final tuneup for the regular season against here's-something-you-don't-hear-very-often Giants' pitching phenom Matt Cain.
There is a chance today's game will be cancelled, due to reports of a huge fiery yellow ball of hydrogen several people have reported seeing in the sky. Stay tuned for further reports.
Yeah, I know you're waiting for an April Fool's gag. Something about Frank Thomas breaking his foot stepping on Crosby, who is out indefinitely. Sorry, too easy.