clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

GAAAAAAAAAK!!!!!!!!

New, 38 comments

There is panic in the streets of Oakland, and for good reason! There are whispers that the A's starting rotation may not be as good as advertised: that Danny Haren has lost his splitter as suddenly, and as inexplicably, as Mark Mulder lost his command, and that Joe Blanton lost his fastball velocity when he lost a few pounds!

Off-the-record references to Bobby Crosby succumbing to an infection caused by a plague of locusts have not been confirmed...yet they have also not been denied! Unnamed sources in Phoenix report that as a group, the A's have looked lackluster, unfocused, overconfident yet at the same time strangely dispassionate! Multiple insiders have confessed that the team chemistry isn't bad, it is simply not there! Reportedly, chairs are flying in the A's administrative offices, as executives point fingers and try to figure out what went so wrong with a team that looked so good on paper!

In other news, the A's got their work in again today, and they continue to be a strong contender in the division and the league.