I'm taking a break to write this game thread, as I'm furiously working on my first book. The book, which currently has the working title, "Everything I Know I Learned At The Airport," will feature important observations like this:
- Airport security will confiscate toenail clippers, but you can buy a book of matches in the Gift Shop. Who are these pilots and why are they so afraid of serial pedicurists?
- You get a receipt when you purchase a roll of Mentos, but you can't get a receipt when you vote for President of the United States. When will Diebold turn its attention to the far more important job of providing data on the sale of breath mints?
- It is not helpful to make announcements every 15 minutes urging passengers to "please be on the lookout and to report any suspicious behavior". In any random group of a couple hundred people, 7-8 are always going to be behaving "suspiciously" at any given moment. I had my hands full reporting the girl who kept asking her mother the same question over and over, when her mother had already answered it; the middle-aged man who claimed to be doing a crossword puzzle, yet left blank "a three-letter word for an affirmative response"; the elderly woman who kept hanging around the Burger King kiosk but never bought anything; the young man who was holding a Michael Bolton CD case and was actually listening to the music (yeah right). As for me, I was reported twice, because apparently a man quietly doing yoga in a pink negligee is considered "suspicious" to some.