Then felt I like some hoodwinked corporate pawn
Much have I travell’d in the baseball world
And many goodly ballparks have I seen
Round many Western Div. teams have I been
Which fans in fealty to the pastime hold.
Oft of one green diamond had I been told
That deep-driv’n homers rule in their flight;
Yet never did I breathe the stench of gold
Till I saw Yankee Stadium last night:
Beside one very loud entitled clown
Gazing out upon manure on the lawn
While mocking Boston accents with his own
Discordant voice – in my nightmares he still talks --
Yapping, upon a bleacher in the Bronx.
Those keeping score at home can find the less baseball-oriented original here.