FanPost

The 2010 Oakland A's in Haiku

A series of Haikus that I have written on the 2010 Oakland A's. Please contribute your own in the comments!


To Ben Sheets:

Can I have some of

your ten million dollars that

you are not earning?

 

To Gio:

Gio, your curveball

Is awesome to watch, but please,

Stop walking people.

 

To Ryan Sweeney:

Your UZR lied

Thought you were defensive god

Now you're on rehab

 

To Eric Patterson:

You were so good but

only in Sacramento

And when you play us

 

To Gabe Gross:

I didn't want you

When you were signed, and not now

Please stop sucking. Thanks.

 

To Dallas Braden:

Can you hear me now?

Toes? Toes? Are you listening?

Get off my mound, Al.

 

To Andrew Bailey:

Thank you for making

the ninth inning bearable

if we're somehow up

 

To Brett Anderson:

You are less than a

year older than me and yet

you're my team's future

 

To Cliff Pennington:

WAR doesn't

lie, but somehow you are the

best. I don't get it.

 

To Jack Cust:

OBP is good

Home runs are much, much better.

You make me want pizza.

 

To Daric Barton:

Stay away from pools

Because you finally might

fulfill yourself, Dale

 

To Brad Ziegler:

If breaking my skull

Got me to the majors, I

Would do it so fast.

 

To Vin Mazarro:

You have quite awkward

facial hair. I don't know why

no one else noticed.

 

To Bob Geren:

If my best friend was

the team's GM, I would learn

how to double-switch.

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