Front Page: No One's Leaving, But Guess Who's Coming...?
His life has been one long paragraph. He doesn't believe in capital punishment letters. A new front page voice is coming to AN in March, 2010, and his name is...
...emperor nobody! We've felt like we were a writer short this year on the front page, with baseballgirl, 67MARQUEZ, Flashfire, and me covering 7 days, and so we've lined up emperor nobody to join the regular crew with the new baseball season, to partake in the game thread, recap, and general front page madness that is AN. We think he's just insane enough to qualify -- heck, he was crazy enough to accept the offer to join the front page.
Why am I telling you this now? Because between now and March, emperor nobody will be easing in as AN's "super sub" and he will be making his illustrious debut tomorrow. That's right: He gets an Edgar Gonzalez start for his game thread debut. Life is cruel.
Now if his debut is anything like mine, first emperor nobody will put up 2 threads at the same time, and then he will accidentally delete Lookout Landing before somehow banning himself while authorizing Guam to invade Canada. Welcome aboard, EN!
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I think I speak for everyone, or most everyone, when I say,
I can’t wait for your Game Recaps!
But seriously, welcome to the front page and best of luck!
ken korach's voice is like peanut butter on velvet, not joe buck's.
Yayyy!
When is designatedforassignment coming on board?
Hey, Raburn! YOU ever dive into the shallow end of a pool?--noava22
by lynnzgal on Aug 31, 2009 8:42 AM PDT reply actions 11 recs
TY Lynn that means a lot to me
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 9:22 AM PDT up reply actions
You deserve to be a regular
It's not the results, it's how you look going about those results -- Tim McCarver
by WaddellCanseco on Aug 31, 2009 6:52 PM PDT up reply actions
+1
I thought the exact same thing, but decided to let my bitterness overcome my objectivity. Suck it, objectivity. -salb918
by Leopold Bloom on Aug 31, 2009 10:33 AM PDT up reply actions
Probably when he stops being verball abusive at posters who he finds annoying?
Not exactly front-page decorum, if you know what I mean.
As for as intellect, dedication, and overall writing ability of course he would make a good contributor.
by Pucking Insane on Aug 31, 2009 11:34 AM PDT up reply actions 2 recs
I feel like he could rise to the challenge.
Hey, Raburn! YOU ever dive into the shallow end of a pool?--noava22
Hey it works for grover :-P
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions
LOL!
I thought the exact same thing, but decided to let my bitterness overcome my objectivity. Suck it, objectivity. -salb918
by Leopold Bloom on Aug 31, 2009 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions
I agree with this statement.
signed, Kallus
"I'm pretty sure I heard Ray Fosse call a run a "point" tonight." - travdog6
Guam is a US territory
Canada is safe, as long as they keep sending us bacon.
Canadian bacon is bastardized bacon
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 9:20 AM PDT up reply actions
I remember my trip to Niagra years ago. I was so sad they gave me ham when I ordered bacon.
I was like, 15.
by LoneStranger on Aug 31, 2009 10:57 AM PDT up reply actions
so you are in favor of a Guam / Canada war then.
Or are you objectively pro-facon?
(facon == fake bacon)
by MobiusKlein on Aug 31, 2009 11:14 AM PDT up reply actions
Bacon and laughing are the same
they both should come from the belly
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 10:17 AM PDT up reply actions
Hey noob!
Can you take my shift tonight? ;-)
Looking froward to rookie hazing day. Oh the horror!
Welcome aboard, emperor!
I'm here to talk about the past.
I constantly get passed over for these promotions.
This is such a mom and pop organisation. I want a trade. :-P
Some motherfcukers are always trying to ice skate uphill - Blade.
youre finger injury isnt real! you shouldn't be on the DL
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 9:21 AM PDT up reply actions
Uh oh
That’s a momentum-killing “youre” right there…
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
lol yeah that was bad
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 10:15 AM PDT up reply actions
Let's hear what your dad has to say.
I like Cindi. A. She never pretends to know more than she does. B. She has unbridled enthusiasm for her "Hotties," and isn't afraid to show it. -IM4Oakgal
You're lucky, OldhamA
We drafted OldhamB in the later rounds as a token favor to you and your overbearing father, and this is the thanks we get? You publicly trash the organization?
Batting 4th for the 2014 San Jose A's: 26-year-old RF Justin Upton, in the 1st season of a nine year, $250M deal.
by notsellingjeans on Aug 31, 2009 5:12 PM PDT up reply actions
Congradulations emporer nobody
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 9:21 AM PDT reply actions
YAY!
Welcome aboard!
"Bobby Crosby at third is a bit of an adventure. And not like, here’s some hidden treasure, what fun. More like, gah! poison ants!" --alea iacta est
Yay!
We’ll try to behave ourselves tomorrow night….at least for the first few innings… ;)
There's no crying in baseball!
now where is the fun in that?
Anarchy and chaos would fit right in with an EN game thread….
Congrats you clever devil…. :)
Zeigler to Geren…."A-Rod? He’s my bitch." -alox
Is that ee?
Is that ee emperor nobody? Welcome aboard.
glad to see
someone keeps track of the cummings and goings around here ;)
Hey, I just bought the team from Lew Wolff... who wants to play third?
by emperor nobody on Aug 31, 2009 3:12 PM PDT up reply actions
impressive.
That was so bad it was good.
by whiteshoes40 on Aug 31, 2009 5:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Did anyone read the fanpost about the NYT article about Miggy tipping pitches when he played for the A's?
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 1:24 PM PDT up reply actions
Does anyone else here have a job, family, life, etc... that would cause them to miss one topic...
out of the thousands of topics covered on AN?
"I'm not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did." -Yogi Berra
Its also in the daily link dump today
this is neither a DLD nor a Fanpost so just randomly posting it here is uncouth.
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 3:00 PM PDT up reply actions
Sorry for not following protocol
I don’t spend much time on AN so forgive me. I thought A’s fans may find this article interesting.
Its ok
Look for something in a fanpost or the DLD first then if you dont find it write a fanpost yourself. It helps keep discussions followable and keeps you from hijacking topics.
Clearly the answer is to spend more time at AN. :-)
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 4:55 PM PDT up reply actions
nice pic
I am the big September 1st call-up, hopefully I will stick in the bigs ;)
Hey, I just bought the team from Lew Wolff... who wants to play third?
by emperor nobody on Aug 31, 2009 1:58 PM PDT up reply actions
I don't think you should be called up
Not until about May of next year. That way we gain another year of AN control before you hit free agency.
sweet, sweet Faustus.
Al: We gotta form a government for the settlement.
Merrick: Who does?
Al: Us! You and me. Come to me in a vision! You stupid bastard
by Leopold Bloom on Aug 31, 2009 6:40 PM PDT up reply actions
you all are too kind
Obviously, Nico has not hipped you to the new rule about only Portuguese being allowed spoken in the game threads on Tuesdays next season.
Look at it as an opportunity, friends, to learn a vital new language and impress your pals in Lisbon. If I were you guys, I wouldn’t panic, just hit Google Translate and make sure you know how to say “Aw, Kust struck out with the bases loaded and no one out 4 times in one game?!?” in at least 5 different languages LOLOLOLOL
Seriously thanks for the welcome, friendlies, I will see y’all tomorrow night… hopefully I won’t accidentally delete Halos Heaven when I set up the first thread, Rev hates when that happens.
Hey, I just bought the team from Lew Wolff... who wants to play third?
Todos granizam o Imperador Ninguém!
"Go ahead and overachieve, you scrappy Brett-Favre-colored walk-takers." —Rev Halofan
Isso é o que eu estou falando.
This is a real asset if you’re going through a HUGE Tropicalismo phase like I am; it really makes listening to Brazilian music even more thoroughly awesome than nature intends.
Hey, I just bought the team from Lew Wolff... who wants to play third?
by emperor nobody on Aug 31, 2009 3:31 PM PDT up reply actions
So you're actually fluent?
Did I get the grammar right? I know Portuguese even less than I know French, which I’ve managed to foul up in game threads on more than one occasion….
"Go ahead and overachieve, you scrappy Brett-Favre-colored walk-takers." —Rev Halofan
Wait, that was Portuguese?
I thought it was Elvish.
And I’m guessing that LOL (but perhaps not LOLOLOLOL) is a lot like “OK” – something that originated in English (setting aside any purported Norwegian connection for the moment) and then was adopted by pretty much every language, including Portuguese and Elvish.
Shhhh
We’ve got him convinced it’s English…
by As Fan in the Bronx on Aug 31, 2009 10:36 PM PDT up reply actions
CSS FTW!
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 3:52 PM PDT up reply actions
Conexão falhou!
falha ao conectar no servidor, por favor tente novamente mais tarde
Falha no download do componente, tente novamente mais tarde.
I'm not positive, but I think I've got to ride
three days Westward and protect the forest of Lothlórien.
That, or Mobius wants me to pick up milk on the way home.
Al: We gotta form a government for the settlement.
Merrick: Who does?
Al: Us! You and me. Come to me in a vision! You stupid bastard
by Leopold Bloom on Aug 31, 2009 6:42 PM PDT up reply actions
Hmm...I got something about protecting the milk on the way to the forest.
Portuguese is harrrrrd. :-(
I like Cindi. A. She never pretends to know more than she does. B. She has unbridled enthusiasm for her "Hotties," and isn't afraid to show it. -IM4Oakgal
Cut & paste from error dialog box strings
something about failing to connect, try again later.
Let Tomko do it!
No, but seriously, welcome aboard. It’s a good thing I have that Portuguese-English dictionary still lying around!
Rickey has spoken. Keep the Athletics in Bump City.
Welcome to the front page, emperor nobody!
Great to have you here.
by Tyler Bleszinski on Aug 31, 2009 3:31 PM PDT reply actions
Oh hai thar emperor nobody.
Awesome.
"I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it" ~ Mae West
ave, o imperator nemo!
sententias dicturi te salutant!
"And Julio Franco is batting right-handed!" -- Wayne Hagin, A's radio play-by-play, mid-80s
Congrats Emperor!
sua mãe limpa minhas meias
Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Caught in a landslide-
No escape from reality-
Congrats Emperor
It’s always nice to see another good AN’er get promoted. I hope you got Scott Boras to get you a big bonus.
I guess I should have done this in Portuguese but I’ve barely got English down at this point so I don’t think I’ll risk it.
Oh I have to say I’m loving the photo that comes with this post. The dude with the bug spray is rocking an awesome middle aged man mullet.
On closer inspection I guess that's a camera the mullet threw off my focus I guess
or I’m just an idiot. I think I know the answer to that one.
Westside club 5:50 pm
Boy is it quiet here
by OaklandSi on Aug 31, 2009 5:55 PM PDT via mobile reply actions
Monday night vs. Kansas City?
You may well be the only fan there tonight.
I like Cindi. A. She never pretends to know more than she does. B. She has unbridled enthusiasm for her "Hotties," and isn't afraid to show it. -IM4Oakgal
Im going on Wednesday!
thanks imaseasonticketholder!
The Halos announcers sound like frat boys at a kegger… Ken Korach calls a game like a grown-ass man - Emperor Nobody
by designatedforassignment on Aug 31, 2009 6:00 PM PDT up reply actions
Emphasis on "few"
6:45 and I’m in the stands
by OaklandSi on Aug 31, 2009 6:45 PM PDT via mobile up reply actions
Very good EmpNobody - Always looking for a refreshing new by-line.
alaska A residing in northern Idaho.
I tried to choose you, but I called a few random phone numbers in Colorado
and when they weren’t you I just gave up.
I like Cindi. A. She never pretends to know more than she does. B. She has unbridled enthusiasm for her "Hotties," and isn't afraid to show it. -IM4Oakgal


























