In Honor of his First Start: "Out Man": The Worst P.I. Ever

by mikeA on Sep 5, 2008 7:34 PM PDT Comment 18 comments

I think my first poetic interlude is at least statistically on the mark.

Here goes:

original lyrics.

youtube

One, two, three, out!

Huh!

One, two, three, out!

There's a strike for you, strike two, strike three

can't hit our main man from Phil-yyyyyyyyyyyyy

'cuz I'm the Out Man

yeah I'm the Out Man

Should Halo "bats" appear too small

Be thankful I will throw a ball

'cuz I'm the Out Man

yeah I'm the Out Man

If you swing the bat, I'll bring the heat

If you try to sit, I'll hit your feet

If you get too cold, I'll call you "meat"

If you take a walk, I'll take the heat

Out-man!

'cuz I'm the Out Man

Yeah, I'm the Out Man.

Don't ask me why my curve's so poor

If you don't want the ball at your door.

'cuz I'm the Out Man,

Yeah, I'm the Out Man.

Now my advice for those who whine (Out-Man)

You won't score off Josh and Devine (Out-Man)

'cuz I'm the Out Man

Yeah, I'm the Out Man.

And you're workin', for no one, but bi-LEEEEEEEEE

Out Mannnnnnnnnnn

4 recs | Comment 18 comments

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Comments

Took me back

to the days of 3-minute songs and 2-hour baseball games.

As for your first ’lude, nice work, mikeA.

I'm here to talk about the past.

by 67MARQUEZ on Sep 5, 2008 8:24 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

MikeA was on 'ludes when he wrote it?

Takes ME back.

Good’un MikeA — you didn’t let The Man wring-out all your creative impulses.

The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus

by The Dogfather on Sep 6, 2008 2:51 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I’ve had an idea for a PI for a while but I’m not nearly clever enough to make the whole thing work. Pink Floyd’s “How I Wish You Were Here” is ripe for a PI. Take this as both a challenge and a request.

Children, until we have taught them better, will be perfectly happy with a seasonal round of games in which conkers succeeds hopscotch.

by salb918 on Sep 5, 2008 9:00 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Aw, geez...

How I wish I had time.

Ray: "How fun is it to be up here playing in the Big Leagues?"
Gio: "It's *SUPER* fun!!!"

by Poppy on Sep 6, 2008 3:15 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

man, that PI made the earth quake!

If you’re not lying, i recommend seeing a doctor. @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 5, 2008 9:04 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

I thought

“Oh great! We finally had a convincing win and now WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!” …only for about two seconds though.

Polynesian Sauce may not be available in all locations.

by Englishmajor on Sep 5, 2008 9:16 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

Pinch-runners hitting grand slams,

the earth shaking, A’s changing colors to black and orange…yep, the end is surely near.

I'm here to talk about the past.

by 67MARQUEZ on Sep 5, 2008 9:44 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

It's Raj what did you expect man?

by mattman on Sep 5, 2008 9:50 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

It's not clear whether God is shaking the tree-sitters down from the trees

pursuant to a legal injunction, or sending a stern warning to cut-down-ers and their Tedford-idolizing, anti-Mr. Running Wolf-setting-giant piles-of-shit-on-fire-in-the-middle-of-Telegraph-Avenue drones, such as myself. Only time will tell.

The A's colors are green and gold.

by mikeA on Sep 5, 2008 9:36 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs