DLD, August 20th: Happy Lemonade Day!
by gigglingone on Aug 20, 2008 1:00 PM PDT
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PrintTIs no joke, today is Lemonade Day. It's also National Chocolate Pecan Pie Day, but I'll start with the lemonade......
I got tired of today's game, so here's a DLD to play with. And, so we don't feel quite so bad about our own team, let's see how some of the other athletes are doing....
- Billy Wagner - out indefinitely
- Scott Proctor - right elbow tendinitis, 60-day DL
- Janos Baranyai (HUN) - displaced right elbow, out of the Olympics (don't worry, that's from last week, it's not spoiling anything....)
- Complimentary peanuts and cookies on United - out indefinitely
So, kick back with a glass of lemonade, grab a piece of Chocolate Pecan Pie, and dump away!
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Fitting for today
When the A’s give you lemons, make lemonade.
Or something like that.
I'm here to talk about the past.
Add a milk and a milk to your lemonade
then around the corner fudge is made.
The A’s got a whole lot of fudge this year.
Green Hulk Fists
by oaklandSMASH on Aug 21, 2008 1:17 AM PDT up reply actions
Monkey eludes dragnet at Tokyo train station
Maybe they should have asked Huston to BART over and talk him down …
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
mentioned in the game thread, but ...
… Big Hurt again making empty gestures about re-signing with A’s for less than market value.
Of course, given his performance this year, Frank’s market value could end up being quite low indeed.
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
I'd much rather have Dunn
For $12M/year than Frank at $6M
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
I have been accused
of overusing the semi-colon; I actually fell in love with a woman who used it as much as I did. Then I found out she was an Angel’s fan; I immediately broke things off with her.
I'm here to talk about the past.
Good for you
Glad to see you have your priorities straight!
"However, at Elias, I think they keep track of the amount of sunflower seeds spit in a dugout each night." - Brad Ziegler, 8/7/08
So, is it "semi-colon" or "semicolon"?
I’ve always seen (and used) the latter.
by whiteshoes40 on Aug 20, 2008 1:25 PM PDT up reply actions
I always overuse the semi-colon
The only problem is; I always used it improperly; it’s like a disease.
by VORP is too nerdy on Aug 20, 2008 2:22 PM PDT up reply actions
Isn't a semi-colon
really just half of a portion of a digestive system? I’d much rather use my entire colon.
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
(I always got pessary, peccary, peccadillo, and armadillo mixed up.)
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
I wasn't going to say anything
But I’ve always been uncomfortable with that term-of-insult also. Mostly ‘cause it’s kinda oogy.
Arte didn't get much Home Run Derby. He was dug in too deep or moving too fast. His idea of great R&R was cold rice and a little rat meat.
by FreeSeatUpgrade on Aug 20, 2008 2:09 PM PDT up reply actions
Those crazy feminists
Always over thinking things…
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
I can't believe there are food holidays for every single day.
Two good ones I’m sad to have missed this year: Nutella Day (Feb. 6) and Dog Biscuit Appreciation Day (Feb. 23). I might adopt Nutella Day for my birthday, considering I officially have something about crab meat and food service employees. No thanks.
anyone else notice that Whiskey Sour has two days???
I think we ought to have a Whiskey Sour game thread next week, for both Monday and Friday! :)
There's no crying in baseball!
it only looks like it has two days if you've had too many whiskey sours
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
whiskey; sours
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
Actually
You’re looking for whiskeys sour.
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
and you're looking for monkeys ball
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
Where is it? (and is it covered in poop)
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
Better than my "Eat All Your Veggies Day"!
"Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona. Not all games and holes are created equal." --George F. Will
Once a Fat...Toad, always a Fat...Toad
Hideki Irabu, once famously described by George Steinbrenner (as reprinted in American papers) as a “Fat…Toad,” was arrested in Osaka Japan yesterday for assaulting a bartender after drinking 20 mugs of beer, and then finding that his credit card to pay for them had been rejected.
Amusingly, the high standards of decorum once practiced by the New York Post appear to have sunk, as they now write out the whole Steinbrenner line, “Fat Pussy Toad.” I remember wondering for a long time what they ellipsed orginally in the “Fat…Toad” construction. I’d always assumed it was Fuckin’.
Arte didn't get much Home Run Derby. He was dug in too deep or moving too fast. His idea of great R&R was cold rice and a little rat meat.
by FreeSeatUpgrade on Aug 20, 2008 2:14 PM PDT reply actions
Hey Free...Upgrade
You know what they say about assuming…
It’s actually much funnier this way. The Steinbrenner’s are hilarious (so long as the Yankees suck)
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
It was never absolutely clear to me
whether Steinbrenner meant “pussy” as in “full of pus” or a pussy like . Mrs. Slocombe’s.
Polynesian Sauce may not be available in all locations.
by Englishmajor on Aug 20, 2008 10:30 PM PDT up reply actions
Awesome show!
When was the last time you worked a retail job where your boss was a “Captain.”
I suppose it happens all the time in London.
Green Hulk Fists
by oaklandSMASH on Aug 21, 2008 1:21 AM PDT up reply actions
rampant inequity in the food-temporal-unit allocation
From semicolons to colons
Get ready to look deep inside Charles Barkley. The former Sixers superstar has been asked to undergo a televised colonoscopy as part of the “Stand Up to Cancer” special being aired Sept. 5 by NBC, CBS and ABC.
Barkley said yesterday he’s flying to Alabama today to prepare for the procedure on Friday.
Sir Charles, 45, says he was surprised that the show approached him, but was happy to participate in promoting awareness for colonoscopies, which screen for prostate and other cancers.
Barkley said that when he told his friend Fred Lavner, of NB2 Apparel, about being asked to undergo the procedure on television, Lavner replied they were “probably just looking for the celebrity with the biggest ass.”
Sounds like he’s doing it for a good cause. I don’t know, the A’s-Orioles game from Camden Yards or Barkley’s colonoscopy? I’ll see what I’m in the mood for on September 5.
This is perfect for him.
I think Barkley’s been looking for an opportunity to show America (nay, the world) just how big an asshole he really is.
:)
by VORP is too nerdy on Aug 20, 2008 2:26 PM PDT up reply actions
His ass is so big that they think that there may be a galaxy or solar system in there...
but all they’ll probably find is a big black hole.
"If you lived in the now, you'd be home by now."
or, perhaps, Uranus
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
Barkley is the Joe Morgan of basketball
Every day is just a little worse than the previous, that means every day is the worst day of my life.
by shooting4life on Aug 20, 2008 3:22 PM PDT up reply actions
Except that he's funny
A funny blowhard is much better TV than a holier-than-thou one. Especially when the latter is proud of his ignorance on certain important issues.
"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want" -Bill Watterson
three network channels for barkley's colonoscopy
and the A’s can’t get all their games televised? Perhaps this should be a promotional tie-in the A’s should get into…
"Don't be an ass!" --Bill King
I ain't watchin' Charles' hole-o-scope without free kraut
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
I was thinking something more local
More like “Join us on the 23rd to see your Oakland Athletics take on Joe Mauer and the Twins— don’t forget to stick around for CSN Bay Area’s Post Game LIVE for Alan Embree’s colonoscopy!”
"Don't be an ass!" --Bill King
Or instead of the drawing for the laser surgery in the sixth inning?
Polynesian Sauce may not be available in all locations.
by Englishmajor on Aug 20, 2008 10:32 PM PDT up reply actions
Biggest arse? Wouldn't we be watching a Bartolo Colonoscopy?
I generally bemoan the profusion of Mr Sabermetric Sporks in the Scrabble ranks who don't know the meaning or usage of 50% of the words they use. -monkeyball
I'm not an asshole (some would disagree), nor do I play one on AN (ditto), but:
— why does the linked article think a colonoscopy has anything to do with prostate cancer? That’s the ol’ latexed digit test, abetted by a PSA blood test.
I asked the doc to leave me awake for my first c-scopy, as I wanted to see what it looked like in there. It was not very uncomfortable, but neither was it very interesting — looked like the inside of a dryer vent hose. And no, my head was not found. Anyway — don’t bother staying awake, but do get it done.
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 5:13 PM PDT up reply actions
Sorry for the repost -- but what IS fun about it --
— is that you get to/have to ahem deflate the colon thereafter.
I chose the Flight of the Bumblebee for my selection, but the 1812 Overture would also do nicely. .
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 5:18 PM PDT up reply actions
I'm not sure I want to know how you got lint in your colon
(Or Lint, for that matter.)
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
It wassn't pretty.
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 5:32 PM PDT up reply actions
was it ... ATOMIC?
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
Not quite ...
Me in junior high.
But lemme guess, you played upright bass for them in high school?
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 5:39 PM PDT up reply actions
Giving Sir Charles a colonoscopy will only make him louder
when he talks out of his ass.
Green Hulk Fists
by oaklandSMASH on Aug 21, 2008 1:24 AM PDT up reply actions
Why did that one fanpost get deleted?
You guys know which one I’m talking about. Not trying to start anything, just wondering what happened.
"Do you know that the guy really doesn't like baseball all that much?" - J.P. Riccardi
The author can always delete his/her own FP. Ima was asking someone how to do it, so I'm guessing she deleted it.
But then, I also think Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 5:05 PM PDT up reply actions
oh ok, thought that's what happened but didnt know how that worked. thanks
"Do you know that the guy really doesn't like baseball all that much?" - J.P. Riccardi
… and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.
Good night.
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 5:45 PM PDT up reply actions
EEEWWWWW!!
MORNING BREATH COMPOUNDED BY KISSING!
Green Hulk Fists
by oaklandSMASH on Aug 21, 2008 1:25 AM PDT up reply actions
But it’s really GREAT shit, Mrs. GG1!
The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus
by The Dogfather on Aug 20, 2008 11:44 PM PDT up reply actions
I think we're all bozos on this blog
"May a nit suck Cajun geese?" wonders Red. No, we see gnu Jack Cust in a yam.
that would explain mikeA's attachment to us
There were a lot of stupid, long confusing words that I’m sure normal people don’t use. @('.')@
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