OK, OK, OK.

Emil deserves some recognition.

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Aw, hell, he deserves some versification!

Driver-in 8

[Original lyrics (for what they're worth: I disagree with the interpretation of some of Mumbles' words) here.]



The walks are built up
Throw by throw
The bases advanced one by one
And the A's manager says
"Hack, don't take, Driver-in 8
Driver-in 8 hack, don't take
We've been shut out for too long"

[Complete Poetic Interlude after the jump.]

Driver-in 8

The walks are built up
Throw by throw
The bases advanced one by one
And the A's manager says
"Hack, don't take, Driver-in 8
Driver-in 8 hack, don't take
We've been shut out for too long"

And the A's manager says
"Hack, don't take, Driver-in 8
Driver-in 8 hack, don't take
You can reach for bad locations
Better not leave men on base"

I saw a clubhouse with an offense on the fritz
Power numbers lower than J. Kendall's lifetime stats
Runs are scoring in Oakland again
Stats you look up, all you see is sky-high, runs score

And the A's manager says
"Hack, don't take, Driver-in 8
Driver-in 8 hack, don't take
We've been shut out for too long"

Way to beat the hated teams
Way to cue fans' joyous screams
Way to beat the hated teams
Way to give the fans all pennant-chasing dreams

He bounced from team to team, free-swinging journeyman
He is selling faith in the clutch-hit crusade
Uni number 8, left or right field, hear the runs score again
Wielders of stats are stricken dumb

And the A's manager says
"Hack, don't take, Driver-in 8
Driver-in 8 hack, don't take
We've been shut out for too long"
And the A's manager says
"Hack, don't take, Driver-in 8
Driver-in 8 hack, don't take
You can reach for bad locations
Better not leave men on base"