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DLD 9/12/07 - One thing leads to another

Ellis, Piazza and Stewart were the offense yesterday against the Marineros. Ellis sux0rz at defense, though.

The only blemish on an otherwise sparkling night for Ellis was a second-inning error on a chopper up the middle by Seattle's Adam Jones. The miscue snapped Ellis' 102-game errorless streak, a team record.

Oh, and Rich Harden apparently exists, and the A's hope he'll start a couple games this season.

Star-divide

Doctors say Bills TE Everett will walk out of the hospital.

Another Bill--Belichick--feels real bad about spying on the Jets.

In other football news, a homeless drunk Scot punched Manchester United Manager Alex Ferguson in the crotch.

Reynolds then allegedly chanted "Fergie, Fergie, shut your mouth" - a soccer chant common in Scotland.

Speaking of crotches, here's the aftermath of the High School Musical nudie scandal:

Should anybody care about Vanessa Hudgens' nude picture?

Yes, but only if you're a teenage boy with an Internet connection.  I can't imagine how happy this picture made a nation of teenage male High School Musical fans.  

Speaking of people who get paid millions to open their mouths, the White Sox extended Ozzie until 2012.

Speaking of crap, Dump.

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If you haven't read Cardboard Gods on...

Baseball Toaster, quit whatever you're doing and read it right now. I absolutely love the way Josh Wilks writes.

Linky-dink:

http://cardboardgods.baseballtoaster...

"Just because the horseradish is a cultivar of different color and geographic origin doesn't make it less of either." - monkeyball

by McFood on Sep 12, 2007 10:36 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I agree

just found that yesterday. good stuff.

"San Jose A's of Fremont" is grotesque

by ArakSOT on Sep 12, 2007 11:10 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

ellis' error

my mouth literally dropped open when he made that error and i gasped!

ellis? error? can not compute!

by gotgreen on Sep 12, 2007 10:37 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

My mouth dropped open, too.

The flood of cuss words could escape better that way.

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 10:52 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Proof that not just steers-n-queers come from ...

... Texas.

This man stands corrected.  

The meaning of life is not so much 'found,' as it is 'made.' --Opus

by The Dogfather on Sep 12, 2007 10:48 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

wade boggs

steals fishing trophy:
At the awards ceremony at the Westin Key West, when hearing the news, Boggs was quoted as saying, "I caught two fish and you caught one and you win?" He then grabbed the trophy and ran out of the room.

also, did you know wade boggs once drank 64 beers on a cross country flight? fact.

A's v Giants "is kind of like the difference between going to see the Ramones and going to see the Bee Gees. A's fans will go see the Ramones." -BB 07/27/05

by xbhaskarx on Sep 12, 2007 10:51 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Boggs must be a fellow Guided by Voices fan

Wade, if GBV ever decides to reunite, I'll have the beer cooler full and on high-alert status.

by Ray of Lite on Sep 12, 2007 11:02 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Great band to see live...

Not only saw Robert Pollard guzzle beer after beer, twirl the microphone cord like Robert Daltrey, and karate kick (very Macha-esque) throughout the performance, but I also witnessed a drunk female concertgoer somehow urinating in a glass beer bottle.

I am Ray Fosse's man crushes for Clay Wood and Jason Kendall.

by franks a lot on Sep 12, 2007 11:14 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Fortunately

Alex Ferguson was not on the same flight.

Thought shall be harder, heart the keener, mood shall be more, as our might lessens.

by Englishmajor on Sep 12, 2007 11:03 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

"Ellis admits error in call of the champion"

Another one?

And I wonder if Boggs' secret is using lemon chicken as bait.

Maybe the dark is from your eyes.

by andeux on Sep 12, 2007 11:03 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Surprisingly, the country he was crossing was

Lichtenstein.

'the a's suck and beane is stupid' --xbox paraphrases baseline

by LAXile on Sep 12, 2007 12:44 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Fun with boingboing...

French art from 1910 depicting life in the year 2000

I find this one ("at school") most intriguing.  Books are being ground up and pumped into children's heads?  And the boy who is working the grinder -- has he been conscripted from a lower socio-economic class into manual labor for the school system, instead of being provided with an equal education?

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 11:00 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

First comment is the best

That picture DOES accurately predict some jackass talking on his phone during the picture show.

by Zonis on Sep 12, 2007 11:08 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

LOL!

There were no comments yet when I first saw it this morning.

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 11:26 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Uh huh, and the sun got in your eyes too, eh?
"Just because the horseradish is a cultivar of different color and geographic origin doesn't make it less of either." - monkeyball

by McFood on Sep 12, 2007 1:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

she took a Z-route to it
habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 1:47 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

In Eric Byrnes' words:

"I'm pretty sure the sun has been just that bright for the last 10,000 years or so."

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 1:59 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The grinder image reminds me of Pink Floyd's The

Wall.  I bet the kid working the grinder might be getting some kind of subsidized year 2000 cheese-product as compensation.  (Btw, I lived 10 minutes from the BNF (French National Library) for a while -- incredible place.)

'the a's suck and beane is stupid' --xbox paraphrases baseline

by LAXile on Sep 12, 2007 12:49 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Kevin Everett's recovery

(Please forgive my Bills fandom creeping over into AN)
He's not out of the woods yet, but this is already amazing news. Just two days ago the same doctors referred to the damage as "catastrophic," and the outlook as "bleak" and "dismal."

Huge kudos to the Miami Project for developing this treatment protocol, and to the Buffalo trainers and doctors for implementing it so quickly and effectively. Marc Buoniconti's injury 20 years ago, which also came while making a tackle with his head slightly down, was the first thing that I though of when Everett went down, so it's fitting that the foundation he and his family helped establish was so key in this case.

Maybe the dark is from your eyes.

by andeux on Sep 12, 2007 11:16 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

That's great news. :)

Keeping fingers crossed there are no vascular issues that come up during his recovery process...

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 11:22 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

great news

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for his recovery

"Don't be an ass!" --Bill King

by batgirl on Sep 12, 2007 12:37 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It's so nice outside today.

I want to skip work and go play in the park with my dog... but he hasn't recovered from his eye injury yet.

by Jennifer on Sep 12, 2007 11:22 AM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Well, it SUCKS here.

It looks like it wants to rain.  It'll probably hold off until tomorrow, and then rain out the A's homestand.

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 11:23 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Low 70s....

little humidity... a nice breeze. Of course, it was 47! this AM.

by Jennifer on Sep 12, 2007 11:27 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

47!

I knew it got hot there in the summer, but that's ludicrous.

47 * 46 * 45 * ...

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 11:34 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

47 F

not 47 C
or 47 K

by MobiusKlein on Sep 12, 2007 12:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

bang!
"In this context, the exclamation is named the bang character; other programmers call it a shriek or screech."
"Just because the horseradish is a cultivar of different color and geographic origin doesn't make it less of either." - monkeyball

by McFood on Sep 12, 2007 1:50 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Less common names in publishing include ...

... "gasper", "startler", and even "dog's cock"

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 2:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Well yes,
But can't a guy try to derail one bad joke with another?

Besides, there is no valid multiplication operation for temperatures. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TemperatureChemistrySmoof

by MobiusKlein on Sep 12, 2007 4:05 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

It rained pretty much the whole day here.
"Female ass are strange creatures. They come and go as they please." -- Sigourney Weaver

by oblique on Sep 12, 2007 12:02 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hey mikeA

Did you see Colbert last night?

Thought shall be harder, heart the keener, mood shall be more, as our might lessens.

by Englishmajor on Sep 12, 2007 12:20 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

No,

has he joined our struggle against the sun?

by mikeA on Sep 12, 2007 12:22 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

He had a guest you think should be more funny
Thought shall be harder, heart the keener, mood shall be more, as our might lessens.

by Englishmajor on Sep 12, 2007 12:23 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Next time I post something like that, I'll add

Warning! If You Are From Minnesota DO NOT READ!

To balance the scales, may I recommend this amusing article from awhile back.

by mikeA on Sep 12, 2007 12:33 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ya, that one was pretty good.
Thought shall be harder, heart the keener, mood shall be more, as our might lessens.

by Englishmajor on Sep 12, 2007 12:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Beautiful weather

is celebrated by gentlemen and rogues alike.

by mikeA on Sep 12, 2007 12:35 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Fog = good.

Rainclouds that rain = good.  Unless they're rainclouds that are raining on a baseball game.
Rainclouds that don't rain even when there is no baseball game... = BAD.

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 12:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Screw *it*, says I
Barry Zito Colonoscopy

by JediLeroy on Sep 12, 2007 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

eye injury?

Did he sneak down to your basement and see Cupcakes nekkid?

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 11:32 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

The eye injury YOU gave him! :)
"I apologize for the negativity. I'm almost out of vodka." -ArakSOT

by pam5981 on Sep 12, 2007 11:41 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Beane admits he was wrong

Sorry, been away due to a death in the family and have not gotten caught up on my reading.  So, if you've seen this before, too bad.  Beane was wrong, Beane was wrong....

"Today Beane admits that he misjudged Byrnes. "Quite frankly, he's willed himself to be the player he said he could be, and in fairness to him, he told me he was going to do it, and he did.""

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/200...

by Just Me on Sep 12, 2007 12:34 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

"Gnarly Hustle"

Y'know, Byrnes reminds me a lot of Pete Rose. Except Rose was good.

Barry Zito Colonoscopy

by JediLeroy on Sep 12, 2007 12:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Ha!

Not everyone appreciates his gusto, though. "He's an example of what I call false hustle," says Padres outfielder Milton Bradley. "He takes a Z route to a ball in the outfield, and when he finally runs it down it looks real good. But if he just takes a straight line, it would be an easy catch."

Byrnes bristles at this. "You think I'm trying to take a Z route?" he says. "Trust me, I'd much prefer to stay on my feet to make a catch." He pauses. "When I play baseball, I put my heart and soul into it. If people want to call it false hustle, I have no problem with that, but they can also go f--- themselves, because I'm not going to change."

Byrnes: F--- yourself, Milton Bradley!

Byrnes doesn't refute what Milton says; he plays the soul card and tells uncle Milty to f--- himself! Classic!

Barry Zito Colonoscopy

by JediLeroy on Sep 12, 2007 12:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

From back in the day....

Eric's route to a flyball:

by Jennifer on Sep 12, 2007 1:00 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You know...

..Byrnes routes totally explain crop circles.

Tell me that doesn't look like the outfield after Byrnes has taken a run at a deep fly, and I'll call you a liar.

The Chavez Shift: 6 infielders and 2 catchers.

by Ozzz on Sep 13, 2007 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

no, actually, that's ...

... a graphing of Crosby's AVG oscillating around .220.

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 13, 2007 3:07 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Not a Fox Tracker-Cam shot of..
..his bat swing?
The Chavez Shift: 6 infielders and 2 catchers.

by Ozzz on Sep 13, 2007 5:14 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

I wouldn't say Byrnesie's hustle is FALSE...

I agree with Milton about the routes, but, seriously... Milton, until you can play as many games as Byrnes, regardless of how ugly his catches are, shut the f--- up.

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 1:01 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Poppy: tyred act.
'the a's suck and beane is stupid' --xbox paraphrases baseline

by LAXile on Sep 12, 2007 1:48 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

She wheely is.
The Chavez Shift: 6 infielders and 2 catchers.

by Ozzz on Sep 13, 2007 11:43 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

he may take the Z route to the ball...

but, at least, he plays a full season, Milton.  And, at least, he hustles on every play, pop-up or otherwise, Milton.  And, according to the article:

He has the highest zone rating of any leftfielder in the majors (a metric that measures a player's success in getting to balls hit in his zone)

Hmmmm...  three things you don't do, Milton

As for Beane:

Asked if he wishes he still had Byrnes, Beane chuckles. "I'm not allowed to say that, but we can make some assumptions."

Not allowed to say that he fucked up on signing Kotsay and Milty, either, I guess.  LOL

Go A's!

by FoolshGame22 on Sep 12, 2007 2:11 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

and...scene!
"Don't be an ass!" --Bill King

by batgirl on Sep 13, 2007 11:55 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Obviously I never watch the NL

<follows link and sees picture>

Since when do the Diamondbacks wear red?  I thought they were purple with stripes.

"Ten times thy self were better than ten Hattebergs" -- Monkeyball, channeling Shakespeare

by iglew on Sep 12, 2007 2:10 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Sedona Red...

new color scheme for the Dbacks this year.  A new logo, as well.

Go A's!

by FoolshGame22 on Sep 12, 2007 2:13 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

nice quotes from beane
A's v Giants "is kind of like the difference between going to see the Ramones and going to see the Bee Gees. A's fans will go see the Ramones." -BB 07/27/05

by xbhaskarx on Sep 12, 2007 3:55 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Barton's debut

Barton was still beaming Tuesday night from his debut.

"I got a false ball at first, and they misspelled my name," laughed Barton, who was acquired from St. Louis — along with Dan Haren and Kiko Calero — in 2004. "I did get the ball, and they had a good time with me."

Isn't the misspelled name thing sort of played at this point?  Is there a minor leaguer who comes up and actually falls for this?  They've got to work on improving their hazing skills.

"Don't be an ass!" --Bill King

by batgirl on Sep 12, 2007 12:47 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

Jeez Louise!
"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

"Geez Looweez"
"Don't be an ass!" --Bill King

by batgirl on Sep 12, 2007 1:10 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

You would think...

Hannahan should have warned Barton...

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 1:19 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Jeez Louise

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 1:29 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

wtf?

I can't have the sound on while at work.  That was one of the strangest silent films I've ever seen.

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 1:37 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

We've traced the sound...
and the screams are coming from inside your head!
"Just because the horseradish is a cultivar of different color and geographic origin doesn't make it less of either." - monkeyball

by McFood on Sep 12, 2007 2:10 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

AND THEY'RE STILL THERE!!!
habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 2:23 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

LOL
"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 2:28 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Belichick

Let's be clear, Bill Belichick doesn't feel bad for spying on the Jets, he feels bad because he got caught spying on the Jets.

I find it mildly amusing that this situation represents a turnaround in how football is usually treated compared to baseball.  Baseball is usually the sport held to a higher standard while football gets a pass for the exact same offenses (PED use, etc).  In this case however, cheating is "part of the game" in baseball whereas I've seen most football commentators coming down pretty hard on the Pats for spying.

Will there ever be a boy born who can swim faster than a shark?

by JLeverenz on Sep 12, 2007 1:02 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

I just wanted to say..

Why does my Comparitive Historical Linguistics professor feel the need to make me read 50 pages from the Indo-European dictionary? How does reading a dictionary help anything? Especially for a prototypical language. Argh. Um...

link

Barry Zito Colonoscopy

by JediLeroy on Sep 12, 2007 1:40 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

come on... we've been using DO NOT WANT

on 4chan for the last forever.

Its older than fgsdgs and Thrust Vectoring for Moot's sake!

by Zonis on Sep 12, 2007 2:16 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

So how come you didn't tell me?

And what the heck is 4chan?

Barry Zito Colonoscopy

by JediLeroy on Sep 12, 2007 2:21 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Haha

Down with the letter O!

Barry Zito Colonoscopy

by JediLeroy on Sep 12, 2007 2:31 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

"Is that baby on the hoof?"

LMAO

"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 12, 2007 2:27 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

My roommate showed me some vids of his friend

dancing and the like with some cool videos...

And then we stumbled upon a brilliant Idea... which I decided to put into action...

by Zonis on Sep 12, 2007 2:30 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

OK, but why do they fling poo?

A science blog tackles one of nature's great questions: Why did the monkey pee on his feet?

"Ten times thy self were better than ten Hattebergs" -- Monkeyball, channeling Shakespeare

by iglew on Sep 12, 2007 3:13 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

new sig line waiting to happen

"It's obvious that urination is about more than elimination and it is great to see research like this that is figuring out why."

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 4:42 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hmm...how to pick up chicks...
"Alpha males, for example, doubled their urine washing rates when being solicited by females. The researchers think this might be how males encourage females to continue paying attention once they've started.

And in 87% of fights or aggressive incidents, the loser of the battle washed in urine. The team suspects that this is also an attention-seeking behaviour -- in this case seeking sympathy."

Maybe the A's should be made to do the latter after they lose a game. C'mon Billy! Sabermetrics, shmabermetrics, that would be a REALLY cutting edge approach!

"Just because the horseradish is a cultivar of different color and geographic origin doesn't make it less of either." - monkeyball

by McFood on Sep 12, 2007 4:57 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

That explains

why Moises Alou does so well with the ladies.

Maybe the dark is from your eyes.

by andeux on Sep 12, 2007 5:18 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

To get to the other side?
"I'd rather see a good ass-slap anyday." ~ pam5981

by Poppy on Sep 13, 2007 6:25 AM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

Isiah Thomas in trouble for sexual harassment.

link
He may be related to Richard Dawson:

Bogas denied that Thomas had ever been abusive to Browne Sanders and that witnesses will testify "ad nauseum" about Thomas hugging and kissing people — "men, women, black, white, adults, children, in front of his wife and children."

(I might be worried if my lawyer's name was "Bogas.")

by mikeA on Sep 12, 2007 5:11 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

he may also be related to Billy Beane

"Bitch, I don't give a [expletive] about the sponsors ..." ... "I don't give a [expletive] about ticket sales."

"Bitch, I don't give a [expletive] about these white people,"

link

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 5:46 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

an untapped market for Beane to exploit

Why not use these as a model and make a market in injury bonds?

habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 5:50 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

That market already exists

and you are already a participant, having invested $20 as a hedge against your emotional investment in A's success.

by mikeA on Sep 12, 2007 5:54 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

but I wanted a shrubbery
habitually tragicomic approach @('.')@

by monkeyball on Sep 12, 2007 6:02 PM PDT up reply actions   0 recs

RotoWorld Is Hilarious:

Kip Wells will "pitch" Thursday against the Reds.

"You're just jealous. You wish you had a rally animal..." -CardinalWraith

by Boonee on Sep 12, 2007 6:06 PM PDT reply actions   0 recs

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