Killing us softly with his swing

Kendall couldn't kill a gnat with his swing. I know, I know juxtapositon or irony or metaphysical whatever. But the fact remains there's a greater risk of being beat to death by an 89 year old grandmother swinging a palm frond at you than you are of Jason Kendall hurting you with a baseball bat.

The very concept of Jason Kendall doing damage with a baseball bat is just ludicrous.

i kinda like having the cleverest player i've ever seen. who looks like he's totally into and enjoying playing the game. easily without question the softest hitting non pitcher in baseball so the defense can work on their kickball defensive alignment. who, if he could ever get on, can steal you and me a base. i'm just a sucker for any mlb'er hitting under .200 who's a threat to go yard for the only time this year on any pitch. (closer i get to you w/d hathaway a nice r flack tune. where did you get your music degree?)

I'm honored that you were inspired!

i will take the words and sing it in our cavernous and sound enhancing stairwell in the office (after everybody goes home).

until I was singing alone in my office with nothing but crickets around me.  

Top notch post but I wish the truth didn't hurt so much.  After reading this Kendall will go into a single-at-a-time hot streak not seen since the summer of "Homerin' Jack Cust."