(with apologies to Thomas Paine)

THESE are the times that try fan's souls. The summer blogger and the sunshine supporter will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their team; but those that stand by it now, deserve the love and thanks of man and woman. Slumps, like hell, are not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value. Heaven knows how to put a proper price upon its goods; and it would be strange indeed if so celestial an article as baseball victory should not be highly rated. Other teams, with an army to enforce their tyranny, have declared that they have a right (not only to bind us with our shaky bullpen) but "to BIND us in ALL CASES WHATSOEVER" and if being bound in that manner, is not slavery, then is there not such a thing as slavery upon earth. Even the expression is impious; for so unlimited a power can belong only to God.
Whether the validity of the Thomas and Loaiza deal was declared too soon, or delayed too long, I will not now enter into as an argument; my own simple opinion is, we did not make a proper use of last winter, neither could we, while we were in a dependent state. However, the fault, if it were one, was all our own [NOTE]; we have none to blame but ourselves. But no great deal is lost yet. All that injuries have forced us to endure for this month past, is rather a ravage than a conquest, which the spirit of the A's jerseys, of years ago, would have quickly repulsed, and which time and a little resolution will soon recover.
I have as little superstition in me as any man living, but my secret opinion has ever been, and still is, that God Almighty will not give up  Oakland to baseball destruction, or leave them unsupportedly to perish, since they have so earnestly and so repeatedly sought to avoid the calamities of a losing season, by every decent method which wisdom could invent. Neither have I so much of the infidel in me, as to suppose that He has relinquished the government of A's baseball, and given us up to the care of devils; and as I do not, I cannot see on what grounds the AL West can look up to heaven for help against us: a common murderer, a highwayman, or a house-breaker, has as good a pretence as they do.
'Tis surprising to see how rapidly a panic will sometimes run through a teams fans. All seasons and ages have been subject to them. I thank God, that I fear not. I see no real cause for fear. I know our situation well, and can see the way out of it.
Once more we are again collected and collecting; our new army at both ends of the dugout is recovering fast, and we shall be able to open the next campaign with twenty five men, well armed and clothed. This is our situation, and who will may know it.
By perseverance and fortitude we have the prospect of a division title; by cowardice and submission and negativity, the sad choice of a variety of evils -- a losing season -- a despirited city -- habitations without safety, and slavery without hope -- our home turned into barracks and bawdy-houses for Raider fans, and a future we shall doubt of. Look on this picture and weep over it!  Or keep the faith and stay true to you're A's