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Copacalero

It is time to praise the A's.  That they're .500 and in first place after an April of serious issues is remarkable, and a tribute to some guys going really, really well.  

And I want to hear these tributes!  I want to read paeans to Chavvy besting old April demons and slanderous whispers of clutchlessness.  I want to hear more of this switch-hitting country boy Nicky Mantle...besides his bat, can his West Virginia deep elbow bends keep pace with those of his Okie namesake?  May Day should find Red Dan Johnson preaching redistribution of the hitting wealth.  For balance, May 20's Armed Forces Day could bring us Barry "Slothrop" Zito and the scary-gorgeous curving arc of his own Gravity's Rainbow.  And I know...I just know...that's there's an AN diarist out there itching to pen an Ode to a Grecian Beauty for Bobby Crosby.  After all, he's Urn'd it.

For my part, I offer a celebration of the A's den of vipers hissing late inning fear at opposing batters nightly. The scowling reclamation projects of the 25 man roster, saving the pretty-boy starters day in and day out.  I come today to literally sing the praises of the bullpen of the Oakland Athletics.  

If you'd like a tuneful reminder, the venerable Barry Manilow original can be found here.  But the way I remember it is

COPACALERO

His name was Kiko, he threw a slider
With green and gold cap in his hair, nasty movement down to there
He was the leader, hard-eyed and angry
With Huston and the Patriarch, his badass bullpen ruled the park
Duke always in the mix, with curve from 12 to 6
They were young and they had each other
Every jam they'd fix!

At the Copa, Copacalero
The nasty shutdown A's pitcher barrow
At the Copa, Copacalero
Dangerous hitters left shamefaced and bitter
At the Copa...they held our love
(Copa...Copacalero...)

His name was Zito, he stood mid-diamond
Pitches nibbling off the zone, quickly rang the bullpen phone
The same with Blanton, more so Loaiza
The starters couldn't go too far, summoning the real A's stars
Duke threw two innings sweet, then Kiko brought the heat
A Joe K swap to go lefty-righty
Then came Hu-ston Street!

At the Copa, Copacalero
The nasty shutdown A's pitcher barrow
At the Copa, Copacalero
Dangerous hitters left shamefaced and bitter
At the Copa...they saved our love
(Copa...Copacalero...)

<extended infectious Latin drum riff featuring dukes, cap'ns and saints, punctuated sweetly by the stylings of the faithful leftfield bleacher choir>

Send your Teixeiras, or Vlad Guerreros
8 digit paychecks in their banks, Garrets Richies Chones and Hanks
In one run games and, with bases loaded
The vaunted sluggers cursed and flailed, Buck and Scioscia whined and wailed
Our pen too cool for fears, more fond of gal fan leers
They saved the games and they saved the series
Now they've saved the year!

At the Copa, Copacalero
The nasty shutdown A's pitcher barrow
At the Copa, Copacalero
Dangerous hitters left shamefaced and bitter
At the Copa...they won our love

Copa...Copacalero
Copa...Copacalero
Copa...Copacalero (fade)

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