Oakland A's Chris Berman-esque Nick Names

by Instant Replay Umpire on Aug 8, 2005 8:14 AM PDT Comment 13 comments

For those of you who don't know, Chris Berman is a commentator who makes up quarky nick names for players like Mike "Pepperoni" Piazza, and Ben "What kind of burger is Roethlis?

I think this off day gives us a good opportunity to come up with some of our own.

Marco "Your fart stinks, can you Scutaro"

Jason "Can someone please get me a Barbie doll to go with my Kendall?"

We all know how Barry dances right? How about...
Barry "Sting like a Butterfly, Dance like a Mos-Zito"

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wow

is all i have to say

Kiko Streetscherer...is where it ends!!!

by jrwolf on Aug 8, 2005 9:08 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Echoed...

Chicks dig Moneyball.

by Kelly on Aug 8, 2005 9:42 AM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

I appoligize if I offended A's fans

I only meant this for good humor.

Octavio "Shhh" Dotel was a line used by Chris Berman.

Can anyone think of a pg-13 nick name for Casey Kotchman ?

by Instant Replay Umpire on Aug 8, 2005 3:56 PM PDT up reply actions 0 recs

OK

Huston " I Have Often Walked on This (Street) Before"

Adam Melhuse Nixon

Bobby "Der Bingle" Crosby

Nick The Swish.....er

Danny Gimme that Long Haren

and a historical note. The very first Berman "nickname" was John "Mayberry RFD" (and his son, RFD Junior, just got drafted out of Stanford in the first round). Berman heard it from a college roommate of his at Brown. And inspired him to think on many more-- ultimatley becoming a parody of himself. That roommate and his friends in high school would sit around and play Stratomatic baseball and throw these nicknames around. Apparently, though I had forgotten this in the many years in-between, yours truly was the originator of John Mayberry RFD, though I suspect some nameless KC Royal thought of it years before but had no pipeline into Chris Berman.

oaktoon

by oaktoon on Aug 8, 2005 9:45 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

I've got a woody Williams?

Sorry

by dougald1 on Aug 8, 2005 9:53 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Calero... gas with Vrooooooom!

Celebrate good times, come on!

by gojohn10 on Aug 8, 2005 10:16 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Best I got...

(Note: To be ideal, nicknames should be short and flow with the name)

Kiko "'93 Chevy" Calero
Keith "Ginter of our discontent"
Ken "Macha-Java"
Chris "Definite" Mabeus
John "Catcher in the" Rheinecker
Freddie "Lease with option to" Bynum

And...perhaps the biggest stretch (and thus my favorite)...

* "Knock, knock" Joe Kennedy

Nico

by Nico on Aug 8, 2005 10:59 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

All I've got for now....

Dan "I know i'm a rookie but get off my" Johnson
Jay Pay"Day"ton
Mark "Why i'm so good I" Kotsay

and for the ex-A
Eric "when I pee it" Byrnes

by Mabster on Aug 8, 2005 11:32 AM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Regarding former Athletic

Has Berman ever used "Eric Byrnes, burns, burn like a ring of fire"? Has anyone? I haven't see him host a SportsCenter or any baseball related programming in years. Anyway, I think it's kind of clever/funny.

by LowcountryJoe on Aug 8, 2005 12:24 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Here's a stab at two

Huston & 13th Street [the number changes with each cummulitive save he has on the season; like in 2006 when it'll eventually be Huston & 48th.]

Bobby bada-Bing Crosby

by LowcountryJoe on Aug 8, 2005 12:32 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Make Sense?

Scott "I wish I had a" Hattaberger
Mark Ellis Island
Nick "Nothing but Net" Swisher
Keiichi Yabu-Dabu-Do
Octavio Dotel I just farted

by Fongpay on Aug 8, 2005 1:07 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

Here's a few

Bobby "Wizard of" Crosby
Rich "High" Hard'en
Huston "Takin' It to the" Street
Justin "Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of" Scherer
Marco "Scu-Scu-Scutaro"

A Beane in the hand is worth $60M in payroll

by jeepers on Aug 8, 2005 2:06 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs

here you go

chewmacha
eric "hope he never calls chavez ravine home"
danny "got haren my eye"
huston "you don't want to go down that" street
mark "took a good hit of ellis-D."
jermaine "so bad it makes me want to" dye

"Some people pray to a totem pole, some people pray to a sun, some people pray to a god. It all works for them. It all comes back to what you think." ~ Zito

by burnone on Aug 8, 2005 3:29 PM PDT reply actions 0 recs