Earned Runs for Troops

by Cutthemullet on Apr 10, 2005 10:31 PM PDT

There's a little more than usual at stake with Zito's less than stellar start, in case we forgot the Zito ESPN2 interview played during the A's-Orioles series finale. Curse of the Charity? Well, maybe, but only if he was secretly donating based on performance during 2004 as well, one would think. Anyway, inspired the following list of ideas for potential A's charities that would be similarly underfunded:

Erubiel Durazo's Stolen Bases for Troops
Marco Scutaro's Home Runs for Troops
Kirk Saarloos' Strikeouts for Troops
Bobby Kielty's At Bats for Troops
Bobby Crosby's Games Played for Troops

now the reaches; need a gifted/creative statistician to determine the totals of some of these:

Scott Hatteberg's First Pitch Swings for Troops
Eric Chavez's Overt Displays of Intensity for Troops
Eric Byrnes' Taking the Correct Path in the Outfield for Troops
Octavio Dotel's 1-2-3 Innings For Troops
Keiichi Yabu's Meaningful Appearances for Troops
Keith Ginter's Web Gems for Troops

keep 'em coming

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ESPN's signs of respect for troops

I watched Baseball Tonighy...they didn't even show the highlights form the game today. That's twice this week they've gone the full episode and cut our game out. It makes me sick to my stomach.

I'll try not to swear.

by Tony on Apr 10, 2005 10:47 PM PDT reply actions

esp. with the color connection to the Masters, heh

can't believe a game featuring two teams with green uniforms doesn't get played...flipped through, saw Berman was wearing the green jacket, so what gives here?

Seriously, Harden's first start of the year, they should know better...I know the D-Rays aren't marquee, but the times you probably don't want to cut them out of the show are when they're starting Brazelton or Kazmir...was this the only game they didn't show? If so, well, their producers suck as much as the analysts.

Don't ask me to buy you a wristwatch Don't ask me to buy you a Sony Car Discman Don't ask me to give you car fare Don't ask me for a cotton picking thing"

by Cutthemullet on Apr 10, 2005 11:17 PM PDT up reply actions

Okay, it wasn't just me that noticed this...

Because I was waiting for the highlights and had to listen to them debate as to which was a more difficult sport - golf or baseball? Argh!!

by Melisa on Apr 11, 2005 1:00 PM PDT up reply actions

I recorded BBTN...

so I could just jump to the A's stuff (I refuse to watch it for anything else). The only mention of the A's was at the very end when Tim Kurkjian said the best thing of the day best Rich Harden's pitching performance. He only said that because Harold Reynolds took what he originally wanted.

And the only mention of the A's on ESPNews was the very last pitch Dotel threw and a box score. After the Masters was over you were screwed trying to find an A's highlight.

by Jennifer on Apr 11, 2005 1:10 PM PDT up reply actions

You tape BBTN?

That's such a great idea.
Thanks Jennifer!

by Melisa on Apr 11, 2005 1:20 PM PDT up reply actions

Yeah,

I'm a geek. I got mad at BBTN so I usually don't watch it for anything but the A's highlight (and we all know how SportsCenter ranks the A's coverage). But since I live in a different time zone, the A's coverge doesn't usually come on untill the midnight (central) edition. If I'm up, I'll watch it. If not, I record it or SportsCenter so I can catch it in the morning over breakfast. I'm poor and don't have TiVo so I have to tape it. I also like Web Gems. Many times I just watch the highlights on mute because I can't stand listening to those people.

by Jennifer on Apr 11, 2005 1:27 PM PDT up reply actions

Another for the troops

Adam Melhuse cames caught for the troops

2nd favorite team: WHOEVER IS PLAYING THE GIANTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

by ConcordFanSince1968 on Apr 10, 2005 10:49 PM PDT reply actions

some of those are pretty good

i think crosby, durazo and byrnes should have to give money to the troops whenever they swing at sliders low and away...

by xbhaskarx on Apr 10, 2005 10:51 PM PDT reply actions

yeah...

troops would be living large

Don't ask me to buy you a wristwatch Don't ask me to buy you a Sony Car Discman Don't ask me to give you car fare Don't ask me for a cotton picking thing"

by Cutthemullet on Apr 10, 2005 11:21 PM PDT up reply actions

How about

Ken Macha talks about the importance of small ball for the troops.

Nick Swisher games without a strikeout for the troops.

Billy Beane gets fleeced at the trade deadline for the troops.*

*Theoretical only; not actually observed.

When will Al Pacino play Pat Riley in a biopic?

by salb918 on Apr 10, 2005 10:53 PM PDT reply actions

ESPN crew

Joe Morgan insightful comments for troops.

Harold Reynolds off season research for troops.

John Kruk pilates for troops.

by emanon13 on Apr 10, 2005 11:08 PM PDT reply actions

Ken Macha's 'Intelligent Use of Bullpen' for Troops

Huston Street's Earned Runs for Troops

Eric Chavez's Booted Balls for Troops

Jason Kendalls Home Runs for Troops

Nick Swisher's Lack of Enthusiasm for Troops

Scott Hattebergs Strikeouts for Troops

Now for ones that will generate a lot of cash..

Kendall/Crosby/Swisher's "times I've been asked how much my father influanced my baseball career' for Troops

Eric Byrnes' Smashing into the Wall for Troops

"I'm good because I ground out to second a lot!" ~ Darin Erstad

by Zonis on Apr 10, 2005 11:28 PM PDT reply actions

Seriously Though....

The title of this diary made me crack up so much that I woke up my housemate's 4 year old daughter.

Good stuff.

by HigherPie on Apr 10, 2005 11:35 PM PDT reply actions

And then there's...

Erubiel Durazo's I Had No Shot At The Outside Corner Pitch Because My Arms Are Too Short And I Stand Three Feet Off The Plate So I Struk Out Again For Troops.

by HigherPie on Apr 10, 2005 11:39 PM PDT reply actions

As a team

2-out RBI's for the troops

30+ year olds for the troops

Blown saves for the troops (here's hoping this is a small #!)

Successful sacrifice bunts for the troops

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

by JJ on Apr 11, 2005 12:24 AM PDT reply actions

More...

Joe Blanton's wild pitches for the troops

Danny Haren's days on which he's clean shaven for the troops

Juan Cruz's straight fastballs for the troops

Justin Duchscherer's AN posts in which people spell his last name correctly for the troops

Mark Kotsay's bad reads in the outfield for the troops

Ron Washington's decisions to hold the runner at third for the troops

Hank Greenwald's displays of enthusiasm and knowledge about the A's players for the troops

by OaktownTribesman on Apr 11, 2005 5:37 AM PDT reply actions

Let me try

Ones that wouldn't make a dime:

Macha uses a different tone of voice for the troops

Kendall cracks a joke for the troops

Rich Harden throws 85 consistenty for the troops (on his fastball)

Yabu wins an english spelling bee for the troops

Dotel comes in second place on that same spelling bee for the troops

Scutaro is looking ahead to the future and not thinking about the past for the troops

Bill King is shagging fly balls during BP for the troops

Andy Painter (Yabu's translator) pitches thrown (game situation) after the bullpen is overused

Ones that would make 2 dimes or more:

Scutaro makes the roster after injury for the troops

Macha reveals that he is a robot sent from the future for the troops

Rene Lachemann cracks a joke for the troops

Barry Zito thinks the past is not important and we should look ahead at the future for the troops.

Kielty, rejuvenated by his new genetically created St.Pats Day/Oktoberfest, shows us why Billy and Ohad are geniuses.

by ohad on Apr 11, 2005 6:41 AM PDT reply actions

That reminds me

Mark McGwire talks about the past for the troops.

by OaktownTribesman on Apr 11, 2005 6:42 AM PDT up reply actions

lol

i thought it would be funny if there were TWO mcgwire references in there.

Kielty, rejuvenated by his new genetically created St.Pats Day/Oktoberfest, shows us why Billy and Ohad are geniuses.

by ohad on Apr 11, 2005 7:11 AM PDT up reply actions

LOB

Runners Left on Base For the Troops

The troops would be millionaires.

by gdubb925 on Apr 11, 2005 7:13 AM PDT reply actions

ex-A

Others with limited fundraising potential:

Miggy gets booed at the Coliseum for the troops
Giambi gets cheered at the Coliseum for the troops*

*ironic cheers after hilarious strike-out excluded

by green star oakland on Apr 11, 2005 8:52 AM PDT reply actions

The only ones I have to add are

* Chavez pronounces his own name differently for troops

*Crosby injures a teammate for troops

Ron Washington waves someone home for troops (let's put the 'oops' in 'troops')
"AN post explains why 'Zito sucks' for troops" (could fund the rest of the war effort)
"Nico resists a joke on AN for troops" (actually...instead of waiting for a big check, you might want to go ahead and start negotiating peace)

Nico

by Nico on Apr 11, 2005 9:03 AM PDT reply actions

haha......

bush finding weapons of mass destruction for troops...

bush......

bush..........

bush..............

by TrizzleNizzle510 on Apr 11, 2005 11:37 AM PDT reply actions

Just for balance

Kerry expressing a clear and consistent position on the war ...

No More Politics!!!!! ; )

devo's gf: "what is it that you write about all day when they don't even play any games?"

by devo on Apr 11, 2005 11:38 AM PDT up reply actions

I agree

by kent1 on Apr 11, 2005 11:48 AM PDT up reply actions

to cover every political party...

nader winning an electoral vote!

by xbhaskarx on Apr 11, 2005 12:09 PM PDT up reply actions

Or

anyone having heard of Mike Badnarik ...

devo's gf: "what is it that you write about all day when they don't even play any games?"

by devo on Apr 11, 2005 12:11 PM PDT up reply actions

who's mike badnarik?

by xbhaskarx on Apr 11, 2005 12:19 PM PDT up reply actions

check fantasy

and also the message board on fantasy.

Kielty, rejuvenated by his new genetically created St.Pats Day/Oktoberfest, shows us why Billy and Ohad are geniuses.

by ohad on Apr 11, 2005 12:22 PM PDT up reply actions

You wrote something about

the Libertarian 2004 presidential candidate in our fantasy league? I'll have to check that out ...

devo's gf: "what is it that you write about all day when they don't even play any games?"

by devo on Apr 11, 2005 12:31 PM PDT up reply actions

hah

everyone knows bednarik is big among israeli high school kids...

by xbhaskarx on Apr 11, 2005 12:51 PM PDT up reply actions

lol

Kielty, rejuvenated by his new genetically created St.Pats Day/Oktoberfest, shows us why Billy and Ohad are geniuses.

by ohad on Apr 11, 2005 12:53 PM PDT up reply actions

no more politics

let's stop with the politics and remember why we really hate bush and kerry. one is an ex-owner of our divisional rival, and the other is a huge fan of the bosux.

by AllThingsOakland on Apr 11, 2005 12:41 PM PDT up reply actions

Kerry is not a huge fan

of the Sox. That was just for show.

A friend of mine, who is a huge fan, ran into him at a fundraiser this winter and asked him what he thought about their new "budget" rotation. Kerry just gave him a blank look.

devo's gf: "what is it that you write about all day when they don't even play any games?"

by devo on Apr 11, 2005 12:47 PM PDT up reply actions

kerry claimed to be at the mets - red sox WS game

sitting along the first base line at shea when buckner botched the ground ball. there is record of him being at an event in MA that evening so probably made it up.

also, gammons had an article once on how kerry said his favorite player was "manny ortez".

no wonder bush got a bigger percentage of the vote in MA against kerry than he did in 2000 against gore...

by xbhaskarx on Apr 11, 2005 12:55 PM PDT up reply actions

Dude

Get on AIM!!!!!

Anyways, Manny Ortez was a horrible mistake.

Kielty, rejuvenated by his new genetically created St.Pats Day/Oktoberfest, shows us why Billy and Ohad are geniuses.

by ohad on Apr 11, 2005 12:59 PM PDT up reply actions

A non-Blo Sux fan born and raised in Mass?

I live just around the corner from Kerry, maybe I should stop by and tell him it's okay, to just stop pretending to be a Blo Sux fan. I guarantee he'll feel alot better, as well as garnering more sympathy and support outside of New England!

by OaktownTribesman on Apr 11, 2005 2:13 PM PDT up reply actions

JibJab

Being able to watch JibJab last November without laughing loudly.

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

by JJ on Apr 11, 2005 12:14 PM PDT up reply actions

RISP and Kendall

Hits with runners in scoring position by guys other than Jason Kendall for the troops (7 so far)
Hits without runners in scoring position by Jason Kendall for the troops (3 so far).

by matthias on Apr 11, 2005 2:59 PM PDT reply actions

POLITICS!!!

I'm biting my tongue!

by kvn on Apr 11, 2005 3:09 PM PDT reply actions

Since I Just Watched Him Get A Hit...

How about: "Fond Memories of Terrance Long For Troops"

(excluding "The Catch" at Fenway of course, and the 2 homer playoff game against Clemens, and someone egging his car in Moneyball)

by HigherPie on Apr 11, 2005 3:55 PM PDT reply actions

Hey

your username is political ! stop it at once !

PS. is anyone else confused about BZ putting up money both to send troops to Iraq, and to patch them up when they get home ?

by green star oakland on Apr 11, 2005 4:01 PM PDT up reply actions

No! Shurb Is Right!

We ought to make the pie higher! I think...

Off to McColiseum!

by HigherPie on Apr 11, 2005 4:07 PM PDT up reply actions

Jose Canseco's

Buttocks Injections for Troops

by Hegenberger Road on Apr 11, 2005 4:13 PM PDT reply actions

Byrnes rumored trades for the troops

Cameron to A's trade for the troops
Kielty best hitter on A's for the troops (oops)
T-Long belly slides ftt
Dan Johnson doesn't play 1B ftt
BB trades without signing a free agent ftt
Consecutive games without a cleanup batter ftt
Trades BB almost made for the troops
Clutch hits for the troops
Durazo behind Chavvy for the troops
Harden throws 95+ for the troops (Heres some $!)
A's double plays for the troops
Red dot wins the race for the troops
Empty seats on mt davis for the troops
Outside pitches for swinging strike ftt
AN comments re: Byrnes, Scoot & Kielty
... and finally...
Hot dogs sold on dollar day ftt

"all a's all the time." xbhaskarx 3/28/05

by A s Eh on Apr 11, 2005 11:31 PM PDT reply actions